


Love, your best girl

by cecimaria, surmelody



Category: Agent Carter (TV), Captain America (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-15
Updated: 2016-05-15
Packaged: 2018-06-08 15:23:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6860626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cecimaria/pseuds/cecimaria, https://archiveofourown.org/users/surmelody/pseuds/surmelody
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A goodbye letter from Peggy to Steve in the context of Captain America: Civil War. It features some characters and events of the Agent Carter series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love, your best girl

I've always tried to be strong. It takes strength and courage to face the world around us, especially if you are woman. And I would say it was just difficult at first, when I tried to get my voice heard in the US Army, but the truth is that even now, many years later, things have not changed much. Women are still seen as weak and inferior, even in the twenty-first century , but I know my value and anyone elses opinion doesnt really matter. So many times I let a man take credit for what I have made, but I was never to run away from adversity .

In fact, I think is a little unfair to say it to you , just to you , my great love and friend. You know me like no one knows, you know where my strength comes from, you know my weaknesses. I would say that yes, you have certain knowledge that yourself is, at the same time, part of my strength and also my weakness.

We had a beautiful story, hadn't we, Steve? And you caught my attention from the first moment I saw you, not for the way you looked, but by intelligence and courage. When you threw yourself on that grenade, I knew you were an honorable man. And I saw a lot of me in you, the same strength to fight for a better world; the courage to face challenges, even with all the dirty looks of disbelief and debauchery that linked to us; confidence in yourself and hope to see the best in people. I had many losses throughout my life, but the biggest one was losing you. And even today I know that actually I had not lost you, not really, I didn’t know that when you dove with that plane and left me waiting for a dance. Yeah, you still owe me a dance, Captain. But I'm not in a position to grant this honor now, I aged. But you're still beautiful and young, the same man I met years ago, maybe just a little bigger. I would have liked our dance, but I think now I'm too late, can you forgive me?

The years I spent without you, thinking that you were dead, were the worst of my life. But that was also important to make me what I am today, to build the legacy that I left. You always believed and trusted in me, in my potential, and I just moved on because I knew I would have your full support. I wanted to make you proud, just as you make me.

The S.H.I.E.L.D is an achievement not only mine or Howard's, but yours as well. You have no idea how much you were part of its construction. You were not only the first super soldier, but also the truly first hero. I think it was you who gave meaning to that word: hero. Because after all being a hero it's not only about having super powers or super strength, it’s about having a super heart. And I know that you have one to spare. You're the best person I have ever met and you made me believe that it was possible to have other super people out there, with super hearts scattered around, expecting a simple push to help and save lives. Fury and Coulson once said that the principle on which S.H.I.E.L.D was founded was purity. Protection. Sometimes to protect a man from himself, sometimes to protect the planet from an alien invasion from another universe... but the belief that takes us all forward, either by a man or by all mankind, is that we all are worthy to be saved. I learned that from you.

Founding S.H.I.E.L.D was a huge achievement and I owe it to you. Captain America was a national hero, an inspiration, an idol, but I always admired the man behind the shield, I always said you could do more. Moreover, the name _shield_ has a reason and goes far beyond Strategic Hazard Intervention, Espionage and Logistics Directorate. You know, that was a tribute to that scrawny boy from Brooklyn who I met, full of honor and courage. The shield has become the mark of Captain America, but the S.H.I.E.L.D was a way to keep Steve Rogers alive.

Building it all helped me to keep me sane, doing what I like, displaying all my potential without fear of being judged. I never let anyone pass over me and made people learn that you shouldn’t play with a woman who knows how to use a high heels and a gun without losing her elegance.

Howard proved to be a good friend, you would be surprised to see the man he has become. He was that cheeky bastard until the end of his life, in case you're wondering. Well, to be fair he did changed at some point – got married, had a kid. Can you believe it? Howard Stark being a father? Poor little Tony. Of course Jarvis did all the hard work taking care of the boy, as usual. And I helped him. But it wasn't a big effort, Tony's a brilliant kid, at least when he's not trying to play with my unload guns as he did the other day. You'd have liked him. He certainly likes you, and I'm the one to blame for that. I've told him bedtime stories about a brave Captain with a unbreakable shield, which his father has helped to develop. If you were here with us at that time, we could even have babysat together, can you imagine? From the Great War to taking care of a kid. I think we'd managed it. Well, I think it's fair to say me, Howard and Jarvis had a great time together, back in the old days. We used to constantly put ourselves in danger, but we never complained, I think we were running on adrenaline. We were a good squad, especially me and Jarvis. You would have liked him as well if you had known him. He would have been for you more than a voice trapped in a computer. Jarvis was my best friend. I trusted him when I didn't trust anyone else. While Howard used to avoid the subjetic, me and Jarvis used to talk quite a lot about you. I talked, he listened, and I think that's a good summary of our friendship. Wherever they are, both of them, I hope it's good. Losing you was hard enough, and even though I got trough it eventually, it doesn't made the painful process of losing people any better. I miss my friends very dearly, but I'm greateful for the wonderful time we had.

And then I met Daniel. Once again I owe it to you, your heroism and huge heart. You saved my husband, the father of my children and I'll never know how to repay you. I don’t know how to start talking about him, it might sound a little strange, but I’m not hypocritical to think that you didn’t move on. I sincerely hope you did. I really hope you have found a woman worthy of all your love and care, someone able to see the wonderful man you've always been. Daniel Sousa was wonderful and a little slow sometimes, but he always took care of me as if I was the most precious jewel in the world. He was the second best man I've ever met. Needless to say that you were the first.

I lived a very long life, Steve. I saw a lot happen and change, I’ve been in situations that I never imagined, but I was happy. I was very happy! And I think my best boy deserved to know it. He deserved to know that I loved and admired him until my last breath.

I feel that my time has finally come and I would love that you were here for me to say goodbye looking into your blue eyes one last time. But I’ll be glad to know that this letter has come to you. I hope it finds you well and happy, always being the Steve I fell in love with, one that doesn’t go against his principles, fighting for people, especially for those he loves. And always remember, Captain, compromise where you can. Where you can't, don't. Even if everyone is telling you that something wrong is something right. Even if the whole world is telling you to move, it is your duty to plant yourself like a tree, look them in the eye, and say: 'No, you move'.

With love,  
Your best girl

 

 

 

Steve put the letter in his pocket as he tried to wipe the tears that insisted on falling down his face. He would have been there, beside her, holding her hand as he watched her leave. He owes her more than a dance, after all Peggy was the one who showed him that he was always capable of more, that he could stop being a puppet, an advertising boy, and go after his best friend, his dream of fighting across the country. He waited so long for her, his right partner, and they couldn’t grow old side by side, building a family or something as giant as S.H.I.E.L.D together. But they had their moment and, although short, was the best of his life.

It was painful to be there, after having loaded the coffin and heard people talking about the amazing woman he knew Peggy was. But, on the other hand, he was at peace knowing that she was happy, she had found someone who deeply loved her until the last moment, who shared her dreams and dances that he could not share.

Steve wanted to say goodbye to her, even through a letter, as she had done to him. He had so much to say, so much to be thankful for. He smiled, remembering that single kiss they exchanged. It had been her initiative, by the way. That was his girl, determined, courageous and beautiful.

He knew he never would love someone as he loved (still loves and felt he would never stop loving) Peggy Carter. Of course, he would move on, he had been trying for a long time, but the truth is that he'd always live in the shadow of that love. Peggy would like him to be happy and he would try to be. God, he would do anything to make her happy and proud, even now. But he would do that softly, after she had told him to commit only to what he can endure. And if Peggy Carter had said it, it was the right thing to do. She always knew what was right.

Steve straightened his tie when he heard Nat approach.  
"I didn’t want you to pass through this alone." She said and hugged him. "The guys send their condolences. Even Tony..." she completed.

He smiled weakly and nodded. Just for today he wanted to forget their obligations, the outside world. Just for today, he would be Steve Rogers from Brooklyn and mourn the loss of the love of his life.

He felt the weight of the letter and Peggy's photograph in his pocket. He felt the weight on his heart. But he knew that would be fine, because he owed it to his best girl. That and a dance.


End file.
